Name: Booski
Hobbies: obsessively combing his hair
Likes: combs, lots of product
Dislikes: flyaways, people touching his hair
In search of: a gold chain and a track suit to complete his guido look.
Author: Annie
Smart Choice, Kid
Me: Dizzle, do you think you’re going to want to be a mom someday?
Dizzle: Nah, I think I’m just gonna have a boyfriend.
Dizzle’s Poor Friend
Me: If you can’t be nice to your brother when your friend is over, poor Gabby is going to have to go home.
Dizzle: I didn’t even do anything. And Gabby is not poor!
My Hopes
In order of importance:
1. World peace
2. A cure for cancer
3. My 6 year-old daughter to stop singing Slow Hands.
And That’s How the Fight Started
I’ll Take Toilets for 600
Question: On June 18, 2017, the toilet became clogged with a watermelon rind. This human is the culprit.
Answer: Who is Booski?
Diagnosis
Booski had a fever the other day and I was trying to figure out what was going on with him.
Me: Do you have a headache?
Him: No.
Me: Do you have a stomach ache?
Him: No.
Me: Does your throat hurt?
Him: No.
Me: Do your ears hurt?
Him: No.
Him:š¤ I had the hiccups yesterday.
Cheese
When the photographer tells you that if you smile nice you’ll get fruit snacks, you’re going to make sure your little brother doesn’t ruin it for you. 
Canonize Me
Things that are cute: when your husband is trying to plan something for your 10 year anniversary.
Things that are not cute: when you realize he’s planning it for the wrong month because he has no idea the date of your anniversary.
How To Keep Boys Away
Dizzle: I want to wear the same shirt today.
Me: You wore that shirt yesterday and it has a big taco spot right on your chest.
Dizzle: I know, I love how I can smell like tacos all day.